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Fire Safety and Female Empowerment

On Sunday, January 7th, at the Friendship Circle, an auxiliary firefighter, Sarah Sabbah, delivered an engaging presentation on fire safety to the attendees. Currently on the verge of transitioning into a full-time firefighting role, Sarah shared her enthusiasm for educating others on emergency preparedness.

During our conversation, Sarah expressed, "I'm thrilled to contribute by teaching people how to react in emergency situations." She is passionate about making a meaningful impact and encouraging more women to join the firefighting profession.

The audience particularly enjoyed the practical demonstration where Sarah advised staying low to the ground in case of a fire, a technique that could be lifesaving when visibility is compromised. Sarah's demonstration of donning her fire suit captivated everyone, and the opportunity to try on her helmet and exchange fire-related stories was a highlight for many.

Sarah took the time to explain that an auxiliary firefighter supports the main firefighting team and shared her experiences of being on-call, often responding to emergencies late at night, during her internship at a local fire station.

In her day-to-day life, Sarah is not only preparing for the rigorous tests that will qualify her for full-time firefighting but also volunteers at a youth shelter and pursues her passion for tattoo artistry.

Sarah's message was clear and motivational: "Never give up on your ambitions, no matter the challenges." - Sarah Sabbah

By Rebecca Sabbah

The National Friendship Revolution Retreat

Cayla Karls, 21, recently joined 150 students from across Canada in Quebec's Laurentian Mountains for the National Friendship Revolution Retreat. The event brought together participants ages 15-25 to connect and learn about leadership and disability inclusion.

Karls, an occupational therapy student at the University of Montreal and volunteers at Friendship circle, discovered the event through Friendship Circle's Instagram account. She relished spending the weekend with the group, noting, "It was ideal for forming future community leaders and creating lasting friendships with people who want to do good."

Kayla Karls, right, with Elise Golbert

The event hosted world-renowned speaker Rabbi YY Jacobson, as well as other distinguished guests including Ysabella Hazan, Lee Haberkorn, Steven Abadi, and DJ Adam Greenberg.

The weekend brought together students from all over Canada, including Montreal, Ottawa, Toronto, Nova Scotia, Newfoundland, Calgary, Edmonton, and Vancouver. The theme of the weekend was leadership and inclusion, and participants had the opportunity to learn from some of the top leaders and educators in the field.

Rabbi YY Jacobson, a celebrated speaker and teacher, gave several keynotes throughout the weekend. His talks focused on Love Relationships, Leadership & communication addiction and  trauma. He also touched on the qualities of great leaders and how we can develop these skills within ourselves. Watch here

Ysabella Hazan, a prominent social entrepreneur and founder of the non-profit organization Decolonized Judean "To Be You," spoke about her experiences working with marginalized communities and the importance of empathy and understanding in creating more inclusive environments.

Haberkorn, an entrepreneur and Montreal Media icon on Virgin Radio, led a workshop on Creative Leadership and teamwork.

Attendees also heard from Montreal's Steven Abadi, who conducted a  workshop sharing his experiences growing up with autism, his journey into music therapy, and overcoming stigma as an adult. Abadi has been involved with Friendship Circle since age eight and found the opportunity to connect with youths from across the country to promote inclusion irresistible. Watch here

Abadi hopes attendees will take small steps in their communities to foster inclusion, such as checking in on friends or inviting someone from another table to join theirs. "The stigma around people with disabilities still exists, and I think this weekend gave people an opportunity to open up and discuss this topic in a really deep and meaningful way."

In addition to the intellectual, the weekend also included lots of fun activities such as skiing, ice skating, and other outdoor activities. There was also a dance party and music performance by Steven Abadi and DJ Adam Greenberg. These activities provided a great opportunity for participants to bond and create lasting friendships.

Friendship Circle of Montreal's Rabbi Refael Paris and Chana Paris organized the first-of-its-kind national event. Rabbi Refael Paris hopes students left feeling invigorated, inspired, and eager to share the message of friendship and inclusion in their hometowns. He aimed to unite attendees and encourage them to put aside differences.

Danielle on the right

Danielle Shaposhnikov, 20, a University of Alberta student from Edmonton, traveled over five hours to attend the event. She called the experience "amazing" and appreciated meeting like-minded individuals committed to making the world a better place. Shaposhnikov learned about opportunities to engage with Friendship Circle.

She found the weekend to be the perfect recharge for the rest of the semester and returned home with a broader community of individuals with similar values. "I feel like I made a really lasting friend group, an amazing group of people who were kind-hearted and hard-working."

"This project has been made possible in part by the government of Canada, and we are grateful for their support," said Refael Paris. "We would also like to extend our thanks to Pajar Canada for providing us with awesome swag, Waff world gifts for the notepads, and Fleuriste Main Florist for the beautiful flower arrangements that added a special touch to the weekend. Thank you to everyone who made this event possible and to all the participants who made it a memorable experience.”

 

Canadian National Friendship Revolution Retreat - Highlights

Friendship Revolution Retreat

AUTISM BRAKING BARRIERS

Myth: People with autism are all the same

Debunk: Autism is incredibly diverse, spanning across economic standing, race, gender and age

Myth: Support is consistently offered to people with autism throughout their life, regardless of age

Debunk: Support is sadly often dependent on accessibility through financial means and can often become more difficult to acquire as an individual with autism gets older

Myth: All genders are treated equally, in diagnosis and treatment

Debunk: Diagnosis of ASD is still based on a criteria that was only tested on white adolescent males, ignoring the fact that Autism can show up differently in other genders. This can often lead to other genders with autism just not getting diagnosed at all.

Myth: People with autism lack empathy

Debunk: People with Autism have immense empathy for the world, it just may not be shown the way neurotypicals expect/are used to.

Myth: You should talk to a person with Autism like a child, regardless of their actual age

Debunk: Every person with autism is different, some individuals may need support with auditory communication, some may not. Get to know the person!

Myth: "Low or High functioning" should be used as terms to describe a person with autism

Debunk: It is more accurate to discuss levels of care, making judgements of what is low and high, erases the individual and can be hurtful.

Friendship Revolution 3.0

Rolling into Friendship

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Friends in the Neighbourhood rolled up in classic Covid curb-side style, and delivered a safe playdate extravaganza on the go. Except, I didn’t need to take my son anywhere, and that was absolutely the best part of the show.  Replete with decorations, sparkly lights, comfy cushions, crafts, a fun and friendly volunteer and driver (you could see their smiles extending beyond the masks), this RV playdate was designed by a think tank of geniuses.

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Those of us parenting a child with special needs during the pandemic have been awarded an extra special helping of HARD. Like an overloaded burger too messy to eat.  The pandemic has thrown the world for an olympic sized loop, and that’s for a population who understands science to some degree and the existence of a virus. Our  8 year old Zachy does not.  He knows school. He knows camp. He knows Friendship Circle. And the daily routine must continue to rise for him as consistently as the sun or there is misery to be had.  And, unfortunately, there was a lot of suffering for Zachy and for us, his family, throughout the months of school closures and the halt of extracurricular activities.  Interacting with teachers, buddies, babysitters and neighbours is the bread and butter of Zachy’s social life. And he is never full. So, even with the reopening of schools, and some Sunday programming, Zachy wants a second and third helping to compensate for missed time. We are lucky that Zachy is currently able to attend the programming that is available during this latter phase of the pandemic. Some kids can’t. They may be immunocompromised. There may be other family members who are fragile. Whatever the reason, they need friends and they need fun.

Cue Friendship Circle.  

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Friends in the Neighbourhood was dreamed up in an effort to combat the loneliness and social isolation children with special needs have encountered during the pandemic. It was specially designed for the sub-population of kids who could not attend the Friendship Circle centre. It happens to be that Zachy is thoroughly obsessed with vans and RV vehicles, so our request for a special weekly visit from Friends in the Neighbourhood was approved. I have to admit that as Zachy ran socked foot from our front door with a sibling in hand, into the beautifully decorated play space on wheels, I marvelled at how exquisite an RV could be and how inventive and adaptive we as humans can be. When Zachy emerged an hour later, satiated with his hour at the steering wheel, glowing from love and attention, I was similarly rejuvenated with the strength to lunge into the bedtime routine and tuck a happy, tuckered child into bed. Friends in the Neighbourhood was one of the miracles of the pandemic for me. It taught me to look into a box, for a way out.

BY: Shirah Johnson

3 ways you should be more like individuals with special needs

Firstly, Hi! I’m Nicole, a new intern at Friendship Circle. I’m excited to share an inside view of the organization and what I’ve learned so far. Here’s are three ways that I think we should all strive to be more like individuals with special needs.

This has been my experience, but of course, no two people are the same. I hope reading through that you’re encouraged to open yourself to connect and learn from every individual you encounter!

  1. Share emotions without the fear of judgment. 

    When I was participating in Friendship Circle’s Lounge, the behavioral therapist was sharing that she had lost her cat. It was not explicitly said that the cat had passed away and one of the participants noticed.

    He asked with sadness in his voice ‘Did the cat die?’

    She told them he did. He looked so sad and other participants started jumping in.

    Finally, it was shared with the room that even though the fact that her cat passed away, there were other living cats who were alive and well. Everyone in the room rejoiced with this knowledge. 

    None of them thought to hold in their sadness at the knowledge the cat passes away, instead, they expressed themselves and wanted all of the facts. 

2. Tell it like it is

A new friend at Friendship Circle told me they like the purple in my hair. Another, asked me why I took off my make-up when I only removed my lipstick. They simply told me exactly how they perceived me whereas I often feel uncomfortable stating things to other people out of fear of offending them. Their honesty is refreshing.

3. Let your feelings out!

Some of the friends I met display tics which are generally uncontrollable physical expression, sometimes from excitement or nervousness. Although it’s uncontrollable, I admire that they don’t bottle up their emotions. They express what their experiencing through some kind of physical outlet. Imagine how much kinder and more relaxed we’d all be without holding in so much all the time?

Diversity is an essential component of the world. Open yourself to interact with people who experience the world differently whether it’s because of culture, religon, socio-economic status, or disability. It’s time to step out of your comfort zone and you’ll develop a deeper sense of the world and create meaningful relationships.

By: Nicole Tock

Nicole is a studing in the Industrial and Organizational Psychology Master’s Program at Adler University. She is passionate about social justice and inclusion and is excited to give and gain at Friendship Circle.

Friendship is never one way

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Once upon a time, almost two years ago, there was a girl named Julia who felt lost and alone. School was going alright, she did have many friends, but there was something missing from her emotional ends.

So she began a significant life journey, to find that one thing that would rid her of her worries. And once you hear what happened, you will never believe, the incredible friendships she managed to achieve.

Her first day of friendship circle summer camp was just fine. She left feeling overwhelmed and outshined.

This was something she’d never encountered before, and it left her wondering how she would find a buddy to adore.

However, there was something magical about this story, something that started to show her how she could achieve her glory.

Being a true friend isn’t about striving for perfection, rather, it is about forming a non- judgmental connection.

With this in mind, she began volunteering. At most Sunday Circles, you could see her appearing.

And little by little, each week got easier. She bonded with her buddies and the memories got much cheesier.

It wasn’t always easy, but she did her best, wanting to make sure that each week she would progress.

Because the ultimate lesson here is that true friends are incredibly dear. They give us another reason to cheer.

They make us laugh when we feel sad, they give us giants hugs after we give them Pokemon stickers that make them feel glad,

They love to tell us about their crazy Disney vacations and have lots of super interesting conversations.

But really most of all, they’re there for us whenever we fall.

 They never judge, they’re always kind, they support us no matter what’s on our mind. They teach us the lessons of “ Ve’ahavta Le’reacha’ Camocha” and to always be there, because we know we can always count on them to care.

That was the love that was missing from Julia’s life, and that was what she searched for to conquer her emotional strife.

And after never giving up on that magical sparkle, she finally found that unconditional love at Friendship Circle.

December - a peak at our weekly programs!

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ART CLASS

This month was all about exploring new mediums!  We created works of collage, pottery, and even melted wax crayon art! We made an abstract Matisse-inspired painting using colourful cut out paper and paint, a winter landscape with newspaper trees, beautiful ceramic animals we painted by hand, and a joyful Hanukkah menorah made by using a blowdryer to melt colourful crayons onto canvas. There's no one way to make art, and it's always fun to explore materials in surprising ways!


IMPROV + FILMMAKING CLASS

During the month of December, we explored lots of fun ways to express ourselves through filmmaking and acting. We created hand-drawn stop-motion paper figures and made them move by using classic stop motion animation techniques. We dove into drama, dressing up in costumes and choosing an emotion to express on camera in a drama skit. We finished the month with "Friendship's Got Talent", an awesome variety show where each participant got to show off their incredible talent in front of the green screen. Then we edited this video into a cool TV show and had a screening party with popcorn and an awards ceremony. It's been wonderful to watch confidence grow, and it's been fun to let loose and be silly, while also learning about film and acting.  


Cooking

The Cooking Class which I conduct every Weds night has proven to be extremely gratifying for the group and especially for me.
I am doing this program for about 10 years and all the participants have improved tremendously since the start.
We have grown together to the point that they know the next step in the recipe before I even have the opportunity to illustrate.
Together we prepare a 3 or 4-course meal and they have the satisfaction of enjoying the fruits of their labour.
We always have a great time together, cooking, baking and laughing a lot.
- Chef Molly .

Karate

Visiting the FC is always a fun and fulfilling experience for me. 

This month with my ladies we reviewed some of our techniques like punches, kicks, blocks, and all while in a strong stance. One of my goals for the ladies is to help build their muscle tone and balance...as well as their confidence.  Empowerment comes from feeling Strong, Inside and Out. 

With the children, we worked on strength and reaction time.  The kids really look forward to some of our "games", which are really an education in disguise.  We practice punching a target with all of our strength (the kids find it amusing when they can punch the pad so hard that they knock my sunglasses off of my head) and we do a timing drill where the kids have to strike a target before it moves away.  And we always work on the kids' balance as well, practicing our kicks without holding onto a support.  And the kids always make sure that we cap off our karate class with our favorite game, called broccoli.

Looking forward to a brand new year at the FC!  Always one of my favorite places to teach

Yoga

Yoga this month has been a more intimate group with wonderful yogis including the amazing volunteers.   We did some fun poses and even had a whole class with chairs. The chairs helped us do some supportive poses and we all seemed to enjoy it.  We did our downward dog with the chairs and plank. We also used the chair for support for a twist and warrior poses. We ended with our legs resting on the chair. This week we will do some Chanukah poses like dreidel and menorah and Maccabees (which is the 3 warrior poses).  

Looking forward to more fun classes in the future. hope everyone has a good winter break

The Lounge

This month at The Lounge, we began exploring a new project called ‘Our City Life’. Using a large printout of a map and our imaginations, we navigate to different city locations, which connects with a bigger theme. Our first location was a gas station, where we experienced the quick pace of every day actions. This served as a bridge into the topic of kindness, and how important it is to be quick to do a good deed. Next, we went to an assisted living facility where we learnt about respect and accepting individual differences. Towards the end of the month, everyone became excited about the upcoming holiday of Chanukah and so we spent time learning about the meaning of the holiday and different customs. 

Music

For the past couple months, I have had the privilege of conducting the music program at the Friendship Circle.  Suffice it to say it has been and continues to be a thrill.  I look forward to Tuesdays 5pm to reunite with all my buddies and friends.

We begin our sessions with exuberant greetings followed by the introduction of our new arrivals (which keeps on growing from week to week B”H) and then we finally get down to business – SINGING! Our sound and repertoire is eclectic. We bounce from English to Hebrew to Spanish. We jump from classics to contemporary and songs in between. Our selections goes something like this; Lean On Me, With A Little Help From My Friends, Ocho Kandalikas, When You Believe, Leonard Cohen’s Halleluyah, Halleluyah (Eurovision), You’ve Got A Friend and the list goes on..

We are a little program with a BIG heart! 

Our mission is to have fun and share our love of music. Our aim is to give each and everyone of our friends their time in the spotlight. Our intention is to take that enthusiasm and talent and bring it center stage. Our objective is to enable our friends and buddies to feel a sense of pride and accomplishment every time they step out of our singing session. 

We look forward with great anticipation to resuming our sessions in the New Year.



Our Top 10 moments of 2019!

This past year has been a memorable one filled friendship, inclusion and love. Before we head into the new year, we wanted to reflect with you on our top 10 highlights of 2019!

But what’s our #1 highlight?

The number one highlight of 2019 was you!

We would like to say thank you for being in our circle of friendship. Your involvement is what makes the nine other highlights on this list possible. Whether you participated in programming, volunteered or donated to Friendship Circle we thank you for being our #1 supporter.

If you have not yet donated this year, we ask for your kind support. Friendship Circle’s wide range of programs enriches the lives of over 300 families with children who have special needs and over 500 volunteers annually. It’s not what you give that is so precious, it’s how much of yourself is invested in the gift and for that, we say thank you!





Meet our Program Instructors!

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ART CLASS

Hi, we are Tobi, Elaine and Danielle, the Art teachers! We all love to paint and draw in our spare time. Tobi paints wonderful oversized canvases (even taller than herself!) while Elaine is known for her adorable portraits and being a multitalented artist. Danielle likes to incorporate humor into her playful drawings. All three of us love coming to Monday’s art class- a place to explore different creative techniques, but most importantly a place to have fun and make connections with friends! We create a unique work of art in each class - everything from collage to printmaking, to crafting with felt, to seasonal paintings. We end each class by presenting our artwork to our friends. We always have a great time! 


Dance

Hi, I’m Emma, a freelance dance teacher, choreographer, and performer based here in Montreal. I graduated from the Contemporary Dance program at Concordia University in 2017 and I strive to create an atmosphere at Friendship Circle that is engaging, welcoming and allows everybody a chance to experiment different ways their bodies can move. We use upbeat music to play with different rhythms and dynamics. We work together to learn choreography and support each other while having fun. Emma is passionate about using movement to create community while exercising! I’m so excited for this oppurtunity, let's dance!

IMPROV + FILMMAKING CLASS

Hi, we are Mariel and Danielle, the Improv + Filmmaking teachers! We met at Concordia film school, and have worked together on many film shoots over the past 5 years! Mariel is a lover of genre cinema and a jack of all trades- writer, director, producer, and camera person. While Danielle enjoys both being in front of and behind the camera, acting in comedy and also writing and directing her own films. We are so excited to explore filmmaking and performance at the Friendship Circle with this amazing and talented group! We have fun using ipads, costumes, green screens, and making skits and music videos! We start each class with a silly improv game which makes us laugh, next we dive into a fun filmmaking activity, and finally, we end each class with performance. It is so incredible to watch each person’s talents shine!


GF Cooking

My name is Angela Maciocia & I am the new cooking instructor of the gluten/dairy/nut/free kosher Tuesday cooking group! I was first introduced to Friendship Circle in 2017 as a contributing blogger writing about special needs from the perspective of an Autism mom & Special Education teacher (adult sector). It was a wonderful experience & I really enjoyed sharing my experiences. I am truly grateful for this new opportunity to share my love of cooking & baking with the FC community! My main goals for the group are to expose them to healthy gluten/dairy-free recipes, work as a team to create meals, empower them with kitchen skills & have fun along with way! Nothing makes me happier than watching everyone enjoying & eating what we made together at the end of each session! I will share more about what we have been making and the types of recipes that we have been using in the next newsletter.

Karate

Hello, my name is Sensei Meghan and I am the teacher of Karate for the children at the FC and Self Defense for the young ladies. I have been studying Wado karate for 26 years, and I have my own martial arts school called Tsuyosa Martial Arts, which is located in the West Island. In addition to the classes that I teach at my own "dojo", I travel around to schools and organizations teaching the other programs that I have developed for preschools, seniors, teens, women, etc. At the FC, my goal is to get my students moving, develop their body awareness, increase their strength, balance, coordination, sharpen their attention and focus, and teach them some techniques that they can use to protect themselves. I use lots of games and humor to do this, along with pool noodles, whoopie cushions, balls, and other manipulatives to give everyone a fun and fulfilling experience.

Music

Shalom everyone,

Please allow me to introduce myself. My name is Cantor Daniel Benlolo and I am proud and honoured to be part of the Friendship Circle team as your Music Program instructor. This past month I had the privilege of meeting a wonderful group of ´friends’ and ´buddy’s´ whom together demonstrated their love of music. This inclusive group of singers are dedicated to celebrating the power of music, to bring joy and to inspire and unite people of all ages and abilities.

Sports

Sportball offers a weekly Multi-sport class. The 8 sports presented are Soccer, Basketball, Volleyball, Hockey, Baseball, Football, Tennis and Golf. Our goal is to build the participant's confidence, competence, and physical literacy. Weekly classes provide ample opportunity for participants to refine, rehearse and repeat the skills they’ve been working on, sending them home with a sense of pride and accomplishment and stoking their inner fires to keep going.

Yoga

I am Debra Berke the yoga teacher. I have been teaching children for 12 years and at Friendship Circle for 5 years. My yogis at Friendship Circle are the most enthusiastic and loving students. From the moment I walk into the building, I am surrounded with love and excitement. Every week we do poses that help them stretch and bend and twist. Very often I come into the class with a plan of what I want to do that day but the students themselves have their own ideas. I follow their suggestions because it is important to encourage them to have some control over their own bodies and to understand what their bodies need. We always end with a few minutes of relaxation to maximize the benefits of the poses we did. Hopefully, everyone enjoys the class. My ultimate goal is to encourage their love of yoga so that they take it into their daily lives and continue to practice. Looking forward to another amazing year at an amazing place.

Drama

Hi, I’m Jessica, I started teaching drama at Friendship Circle this Fall. i’m passionate about the performing arts and how it can play a role in the development of young people. The drama class is helps particpants build their self-confidence and have fun. We’ve incorporated improvisation games, situation games and observation games. The students also got to put their creativity to test by making their own puppets.



Everything you need to know about Walk4Friendship 2019

Friendship Circle's 11th Annual Walk4Friendship will take place this Sunday, November 3rd, 11am at the Old Port of Montreal. Join us and walk to promote friendship and inclusion for individuals with special needs!

Here's everything you need to know all in one place, we got you!

Do I need to pre-register?

There is no charge for the Walk & post-walk celebration for all who pre-register by November 1st.

At the Walk, there will be a charge of $25/per person for those who haven’t registered.

Register here

How can I get to the Walk site?

We're offering free shuttles from Walmart on Decarie to and from the Walk. click here to reserve a spot. RSVP is a must.

If you're coming by car, you can park at the onsite parking lot at the Clock Tower Pier 1 Quai de l'Horloge St, Montreal, QC H2L 5C1. All those who fundraise $180 or more will receive complimentary parking tickets.

What is the exact location?

Registration and Festivities will take place right beside the Clock Tower.

Click here for the map.

What will the Walk celebration offer?

the exciting post walk festivities will include:

face painting • glitter & airbrush tattoos • caricatures • tech games • sensory space, craft booth, dog grooming, interactive mural, hot drinks & snacks & more! All for no charge thanks to generous sponsors!

All walkers who fundraise $100 and above will receive complimentary tickets to Montreal's "Giant Ferris Wheel" following the walk celebration! Generously sponsored by La Grande roue de Montréal.

Can I volunteer?

Yes! We still have a few volunteer slots available. Please fill out the volunteer form and select which role would best suit you.

Oh, one more thing, inclusion means everyone is essential so bring your friends, bring your family, and bring that stranger you met on the street! It's going to be as awesome as it sounds!

Celebrating Special Moms!

The bond between mother and child cannot be fully understood until it is felt. It is a bond of overwhelming compassion, of the most nurturing love and the greatest support a child could ever receive. Becoming a mom is the hardest job on earth. It is a life changing experience that doesn’t come with any training manuals or ‘How To’ books. Every child is different, every situation unique and mom’s have to become household CEOs, referees, medicine specialists, best friends and the roles go on and on, all without ever taking a day off or calling in sick.  

 

Today is a day we celebrate our mothers, all mothers and reflect on the impact their nurturing love and overwhelming compassion has made on our lives.

 

We have asked moms of special needs kids for some love and advice to share with us. Here is what these wonderful women had to say!

 

What is the most rewarding aspect of being a mom to a child with special needs?

 

“I realized so early that my daughter was not going to be me.  That my experience of being the smart kid in the class, was not going to be hers. I didn't know before she was born that what I wanted for my child was to live life without making my mistakes - I think that most parents do this and struggle with letting their kids be themselves, and recognizing them as individuals.  My daughter was an individual from the get-go.  Not only was she not me - she was not any of the kids in the childcare books.  It's allowed me to support her in being her more easily and earlier than I think I would have otherwise”. 

 - Jennifer Gann, daughter Hollis, age 12

“Appreciating every moment. My daughter wakes up and greets every day with a smile... she is a free spirit, a pure soul”

- Louise Roy, daughter Brittany, age 17

 

“How much they humble you”

- Joan Gottman, son Alex, age 17

 

“...the rewarding aspect of being a mom to a child with special needs is that I can help others with their awareness.”

- Ericka Tencer, daughter Atara, age 21

 

What advice would you give a new mom of a child with special needs?

 

“Don't stop believing. Don't be afraid to break down barriers. Don't be afraid to open doors. Just go for it no matter what”

- Louise Roy, daughter Brittany, age 17

 

“For any new mom, be flexible, for the new mom of a special kid - follow your kid. Parenting is often about pushing your child to the edge of their capability without tumbling over.  You want to challenge but not frustrate them. Our daughter has over and over again shown us what she's ready to learn at different stages. We don't feel the need to push on something she should know, or we'd like her to know.  We're ready when she's ready.”

- Jennifer Gann, daughter Hollis, age 12

 

“Be proud and follow your heart”

- Liliane Ouaknine, son Max, age 44

 

“To take a picture of each doctor or volunteer that works with their child with name, title, dates.  Keep one log with medical, and other issues pertaining to their child, so everything is in one book/folder/binder and not in various folders.”

- Nechama Dahan, daughter Bracha 

 

“Bring them home, love them, hug them, kiss them, get to know them.  Don't be attached to any expectations of what you know, be attached to the journey that truly is a unique experience for you and your family.  Know that you will be okay.  Know that there is a whole world of support that you may not even know existed.  Know that your child will bring you wisdom and joy.  And again, know you will be okay.”

- Joan Gottman, son Alex, age 17

 

“Try your hardest to shed your expectations. The words of others may distract you.”

- Ericka Tencer, daughter Atara, age 21

 

What have you learned about yourself, since becoming a mother?

 

“That I could juggle more balls than I  ever imagined possible and keep them all from dropping, rolling away and being lost forever.”

- Joan Gottman, son Alex, age 17

 

“Hah! Prior to motherhood neither I nor anyone who knows me would have called me a patient person. I am now, and it extends (sometimes) beyond my daughter!”

- Jennifer Gann, daughter Hollis, age 12  

 

“I think that it’s a privilege to have these two precious children. No, I will not deny it. It’s really not easy, but my kids teach me such valuable lessons. My older son teaches me about love for Judaism. My second son teaches me resilience and how to adapt to any situation in a positive way. They both teach me many more important lessons like patience and responsibility to name a few.”

- RR, sons Dovid, age 10 and Yosef Shalom, age 5

 

“I am stronger than I thought ”

- Liliane Ouaknine, son Max, age 44

 

“Being a mother is not easy but worth every smile and hug you get from the one or ones who gave you that title!”

- Florence Fried, son Morgan, age 21

 

What gifts has your special needs child brought into your life?

 

“My child faces the world with joy and wonder. He is empathetic to all people, regardless of ability, class, age, race, attitude etc. He enjoys and will participate in anything. He is never attached to the result of “success” but rather always enjoys the ride”

- Joan Gottman, son Alex, age 17

 

“She helped give me awareness and capability.”

- Ericka Tencer, daughter Atara, age 21

 

“Patience. The understanding that life is fragile and precious and should not be taken for granted. Difference – we are all different and that is good.”- Florence Fried, son Morgan, age 21

 

“Acceptance. Tolerance. Understanding”

- Louise Roy, daughter Brittany, age 17

 

How will you be celebrating this Mother's Day?

 

“...I do know that somebody else in my home will make the coffee that morning”

- Joan Gottman, son Alex, age 17

 

“Don't know - it's a surprise. My daughter is a real conservative about holiday celebrations, so i suspect it will involve flowers and breakfast in bed.” - Jennifer Gann, daughter Hollis, age 12

 

“with my mother with all her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren”

- Liliane Ouaknine, son Max, age 44

 

-Friendship Circle wishes all our moms, a very Happy Mother’s Day-


By: Nina Sloma, Media Intern at Friendship Circle

A Special Needs Friendly Passover Guide

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A Special Needs Friendly Passover Guide

The Holiday of Passover is fast approaching and many are making preparations and plans for their seder, One of the core components of the Passover Seder is involving your children and making sure they are active participants.

For a family with a child with special needs passover can be a very challenging experience. The new environment, different routine, the length of the seder, and the different types of foods make it difficult for an individual with special needs to participate. To make your passover as smooth as possible here are some special needs friendly resources we hope you find helpful.

1. How to Make a Sensory Friendly Passover Seder

Many children with special needs can’t sit by the dinner table for more than 5 minutes. Can you imagine a lengthy Passover Seder? Here are some tips for a child and sensory friendly Seder.
Read the article.

2.  10 Passover Toys for your child with Special Needs

For a special needs family, keeping a child engaged throughout the Seder is pretty challenging! To make things a bit easier we have compiled a list of passover toys that will make them an active participant.
Read the article

3.  Visuals & Social Stories

Gateways provides some great online resources for Passover. Resources include versions of the Passover story (with boardmaker symbols), visual supports for PassoverPassover songs with visual supports, and much more!

4.  Gluten Free Matzah & Recipes

Do you have a child, family member or friend who is on a gluten-free diet?  If the answer is yes then this post is for you. Find out where you can purchase gluten-free oat Matzah for Passover plus check out three great cookbooks that offer up some great gluten-free dishes.
Read the post here.

5.  Passover Website For Kids!

Designed for children of all ages and abilities. Passover For Kids is a great site created by chabad.org. The site is full of activities for every child and features interactive games, video, audio and much more to teach, engage and entertain child about the festival of Passover.
Visit the Passover For Kids site.

6.  10 Freedoms Every Special Needs Parent Should Have

Lets not forget the parents! Passover commemorates the Freedom of the Jewish People from their enslavement in Egypt. Here are 10 Freedoms Special Needs Parents should have as well.
Read the article

Adapted with permission from https://www.friendshipcircle.org/blog

Copy of Our Top Picks for Special Needs Friendly Trips in & Around Montreal

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We all love having the chance to enjoy the great activities Montreal has to offer. But what if a member of your family has special needs? It can be challenging to find enjoyable family friendly spots that also accommodate and welcome those with special needs.

 

At Friendship Circle we’ve had the opportunity to explore many activities around the city with our special friends! Below is our top picks of establishments that offer a great time  and accommodate & welcome people of all abilities

 

 

Outdoors

Quinn Farm

Quinn Farm is a perfect trip for the summer or fall. Check in advance to see what’s in season for picking! A tractor ride takes you to the field which our friends loved (alternatively it’s not too far if you want to walk). Then,  you have a chance to fill your bag or basket with the season’s goodies. Afterwards, your child can enjoy seeing the farm animals and playing on the farm themed playground. There’s also a nice indoor shop with bathrooms. We found the farm to be an affordable and great time with accommodating staff.

Granby Zoo  

Granby Zoo is a Friendship Circle’s yearly grand trip! There are so many great animal exhibits divided by country and continent so you can experience animals around the world. There’s lots of walking involved so be sure to wear comfortable shoes and take advantage of the strollers they offer at the entrance if your child has trouble with long walks! In addition to the zoo animals there’s a nice size amusement area with a variety of rides, many of which are included in the zoo fee.


 

Cap-Saint-Jacques Nature Park

Cap-Saint-Jacques is a perfect trip to enjoy Montreal’s glorious summer! They offer a wide variety of activities so you can plan ahead based on your child’s preferences and abilities.

Our favorite activities include archery, canoeing, swimming, and making sand castles on the private beach! The Park also has a large dining area and awesome staff!

 

Indoors

PI-O Amusement Park

PI-O is a an amusement park just for children and it’s indoors too! It’s great for a variety of ages and perfect for a cold winter day. The staff is cheerful, energetic, and friendly. When a child had a hard time getting on and off a ride or wanted to stay over and over the staff easily accommodated them in a respectful and understanding manner.

 

Skytag

Skytag’s wall-to-wall trampolines offer several activity areas and a foam pit! It’s suitable for all ages and fitness levels! (They also have laser tag for those who don’t have sensitivity to laser lights)

We were most impressed by the staff who went out of their way to converse and welcome our friends with special needs! The manager at Skytag is extremely accommodating so feel free to call ahead if you have any concerns!


 

Musee Pour Enfants

The children’s Museum in Laval is great for children! So great in fact, that most of our special friends refused to leave:)  The museum features a mini city including a grocery store, restaurant, school, construction zone, fire truck, ambulance, farm, theater and more! Definitely a favorite of ours:)


 

IMAX TELUS Montréal Science Centre

Montreal Science Centre is great for a rainy day and open on holidays! The Science centre exhibits are beautifully made with lots of opportunity for hands on activities and experiences. We found it to be great for all ages. Additionally the Imax can be a great experience if your child is comfortable in a theater.

 

*Winter Fun

 

Village du Pere Noel (Val David)

 

A great and affordable Winter experience that really has something for everyone to enjoy!

The village has a farm area where you can enter and interact with the animals, snow tubing, play area, mini electric train, and trampolining! We loved how the staff interacted with our special friends!  They have a large chalet which is a great place to warm up and relax in a friendly environment.

 

Mont Avila

Mont Avila has quickly become our favorite snow tubing adventure! It’s a great time especially if you’re looking for something a bit grander than tubing around the city. We love that they have a smaller hill with a belt lift in addition to the bigger mountains, making it a great trip for all ages. They also offer rafting (a tube that accommodates about 10 ppl!) which is great for pilling the whole family in!


 

What’s your favorite family outing? Please comment below :)



 

*** Please note that the above is based on Friendship Circle’s experiences with children, teens, and young adults with and without special needs, and not a professional recommendation. Keep in mind that depending on your child’s challenges, you may have a different experience. We recommend always doing a bit of your own research while keeping your child's needs in mind!

15 Tips for a Sensory Friendly Purim

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What child doesn’t look forward to Purim?

It’s the only time when a kid can put on a costume, feast on an abundance of treats and make a lot of noise in synagogue without getting in trouble.

What child doesn’t look forward to Purim?

My child.

And since you’re reading this, I’m guessing your child doesn’t either.

The Noise

Purim, the most festive and spirited Jewish holiday can be an utterly overwhelming experience for a child with autism or sensory issues.

The shaking of graggers along with the shouts, boos and foot stomping heard each time Haman’s name is mentioned during the Megillah reading is seriously loud.

It’s supposed to be.

That’s why most kids like it.

But not ours.

Purim is the only Jewish holiday where kids are encouraged to get dressed up.

The Costumes

While most kids spend months planning their costumes, our kids think the costumes are itchy and uncomfortable. Asking them to wear a mask, beard, hat or crown would be like asking a child to do extra homework just for fun.

It’s probably not going to happen.

The Food

The traditional holiday treats such as hamantaschen, are different and plentiful. But my son and so many of our kids have dietary restrictions that make it difficult for them to enjoy the customary mishloach manot (Purim baskets) from others.  Before my son outgrew some of his allergies, about the only thing he could eat from a mishloach manot basket was a box of raisins.

So how do families like ours enjoy the wildest most festive Jewish holiday? By planning ahead and modifying. Here are 15 tips to help you enjoy Purim with your sensory sensitive child.

Getting through the Megillah Reading

Depending on the setting a Megillah reading can be as short as 25 minutes or as long as 45 minutes. Some readers are faster than others and some synagogues take more breaks to spin the groggers and make some noise. Here are seven tips for enabling a child with autism to sit through a Megillah reading.

1. Work with your local Synagogue

Check to see if there is a synagogue in your area that has a sensory-friendly Megillah reading.  There do not seem to be many around but maybe you’ll be lucky enough to find one near you. If there isn’t one, try working with a local congregation to start one. Alternatively contact your local Chabad Center they may be able to arrange a private (and quick) Megillah Reading.

2. Create a Social Story

Find images or video online of a Megillah reading and create a social story. A Megillah reading online to help prepare your child for what to expect. Repetition may be annoying for you but helpful for your child.

3. Find Quiet

During the reading find a quieter spot, if possible, in the sanctuary.  It may be in the back of the room or away from the speakers if there are any.

4. Backup Plans

Go with a backup plan, such as sitting outside the sanctuary if the noise becomes too much.

5. Incentives

Negotiate a plan with your child such as “if you sit through the first 15 minutes in the sanctuary we can spend the rest of the time listening to the Megillah from outside.”

6. Watch While Listening

Watch a purim video on a phone or tablet with the sound off while the Megillah is being read. This will enable your child to listen to the reader while watching the story of purim (you may want to explain the situation to others around you so they understand why your phone is out and about).

7. Try and Try Again

Don’t set your expectation too high.  If you try it and it’s too much for your child, know that next year may be easier. For our son the more we expose him, the easier it gets because he learns what to expect.

Finding a Costume

Nobody knows your child’s likes or dislikes better than you. Keep his sensitivities in mind when buying or making a costume.

8. If possible, include your child in the process of selecting or making the costume.
9. Keep it simple if necessary.
10. There are a lot of suggestions online if you search for sensory friendly costumes.
11. Have your child wear his or her costume as much as possible prior to Purim. If your child is like mine, he may just keep wearing it long after the holiday ends.
12. If your child refuses to wear a costume that’s ok too. It shouldn’t preclude him from participating.

Enjoying the Treats

13. There are a number of recipes for gluten-free hamantaschen online and some of the recipes I saw did not contain dairy.  A recipe we tried and liked came from: http://glutenfreebay.blogspot.com

14. If you know someone is planning on giving your family mishloach manot, tell that person about your child’s dietary restrictions if you are comfortable doing so.

15. Alternatively, give them safe foods to include in your mishloach manot or swap out the unsafe treats with foods your child can enjoy.

What are your best tips for a sensory-friendly Purim?

 

 

Adapted with Permission from www.FriendshipCircle.org/blog

By: Jennifer Lovy

Jennifer Lovy is a freelance writer, part-time accounting manager, recovering attorney, and perpetual advocate for her three children, particularly her son with autism. She shares daily life with Evan on her own blog SpecialEv.com.

Six Children’s Books on Diversity and Acceptance of Self and Others

Have a child, grandchild or student who is not coping well because he feels different from his friends and classmates? So often children feel they are “different” than their peers. Whether it is a perception or a reality that one doesn’t fit in, it can be a painful experience. These children must be listened to and supported and discussing the following books would be very helpful.

Are you working with children and would like a resource to help them understand the hurt they cause when they tease or shun another because of a physical difference, a personality difference, or a disability? Sometimes children are not accepted and ignored because of their clothes, their accent, their personal interests,and other things way out of their control like having a sibling who is different. The bullies must also be helped and understanding children with special needs or who are different in any way is the first step to acceptance.

We suggest teachers, librarians, day care staff, and parents read and discuss with children the following six books reviewed and recommended by Special Needs Book Review.

1. Noah and Logan Series of Children’s Books on Social and Life Skills

By Benjamin K.M. Kellogg
Series of books for ages 2 – 5 and grades P-1 that teach social and life skills like friendships, sharing, cleaning up, concepts of colors, time, and schedules. Benjamin Kellogg is on the autism spectrum and he hopes his books will help children develop the skills which were difficult for him to master.

In an interview the author explained that because of his unique perspective, he struggled with developing social and life skills. Cleaning his room and sharing with others along with many other skills were very challenging for him. With help and much love from his parents and family and the support of some great therapists, teachers, and friends, he eventually learned. Theresa Kellogg, Benjamin’s mother, illustrates each story based on his ideas because he has fine motor problems making it difficult for him to draw.

2Mizz Goodie 2 Shoez In “Shoe-Autism”

By Charoletta Anderson

The unique, bold and colorful characters of the Mizz Goodie 2 Shoez series demonstrate a wide range of emotion and conversation and the story narrative is engaging and educational.  These children’s books with playful high fashion shoe characters uplift the spirit of children with autism and cancer.

The author uses her love of fashion and shoes and creates a fun new way to teach children values, hope, courage, and the importance of honor and self-esteem.  Reading a book together it gives a child that one on one personal connection with the story line and characters especially as it may relate to their own life and diagnosis.

3We’re Not So Different After All

By Charoletta Anderson

The unique, bold and colorful characters of the Mizz Goodie 2 Shoez series demonstrate a wide range of emotion and conversation and the story narrative is engaging and educational.  These children’s books with playful high fashion shoe characters uplift the spirit of children with autism and cancer.

The author uses her love of fashion and shoes and creates a fun new way to teach children values, hope, courage, and the importance of honor and self-esteem.  Reading a book together it gives a child that one on one personal connection with the story line and characters especially as it may relate to their own life and diagnosis.

4. Rainbow of Friendship

By Joni Klein-Higger

Rainbow of Friendship is a fun, rhyming picture book that addresses diversity and acceptance of others and ourselves. It helps children learn at a very early age about the diverse mix of people we find in all our cities, towns, and communities. It’s a wonderful story in rhyme form with colorful illustrations that support the story. This children’s book not only helps children discover the joy of friendship but also the rainbow colors, shapes and sizes. They will learn that having friends from all walks of life and from different cultures enriches their own lives.

We live in a diverse world filled with unique individuals, each offering his or her own special gifts. The characters in this book are a variety of colors, shapes and sizes. This aspect of the book is meant to be used as a teaching tool to educate the youngest readers about basic colors, shapes and sizes in a fun way. But for older readers, the colors, shapes and sizes represent individuality, how important it is to not be afraid of people who are different than we are, and the importance of accepting ourselves, as well as accepting others. It received Creative Child Magazine’s 2015 Book of the Year Award in the Kids’ Books Category.

5. Love for Logan

By Lori DeMonia

It is an inspirational children’s book on Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) based on actual events and a great sequel to Lori’s first book, Leah’s Voice, about a sibling with autism.

In Love for Logan, readers learn a few strategies that can be used to help Leah’s sensory issues like telling her what will happen so she is prepared. For example, knowing in advance about a fire drill can help a child sensitive to loud noises. If family members, teachers, and friends know that SPD is very common in children with autism they will be able to help them cope when sensory issues arise or better still BEFORE these children are overwhelmed.

Reading both these books with your children or to students is the perfect way to open up a discussion on children with special needs, accepting differences, respecting and including others and to learn what children with sensory issues or autism must face every day.

6. Little Lonnie Long Ears

By Mary Jean Kelso

Little Lonnie Long Ears is a fully illustrated children’s book for ages 3 to 9.  Illustrator KC Snider brings to life Mary Jean Kelso’s characters and the author’s words help children who feel rejected and alone learn that it’s “OK to be different”.

It’s about a rabbit with a problem. His ears are longer than all the other bunnies. He cannot hop and play and keep up with the other bunnies. He is upset because he is “different”.  All but one of the bunnies on the farm teases and avoids him because his ears are longer than theirs. The bullies reading this story will realize the hurt they inflict when they tease or do not include children with differences.
Read the complete review. 

In Closing:

How can parents, teachers, and other care givers raise a generation of children that are aware and unafraid of people that look and act differently? How can we show children how alike we really all are? A great way is with these delightful picture books of acceptance and understanding of differences.

Here is an excerpt of We’re Not So Different After All by Lissette Lent that says it all:

Maggie has taught me to not be afraid.
We may all look different but we are equally made.
It’s okay to be curious, ask questions and smile.
You can even offer your help every once in a while.

So, mommies and daddies it’s all up to you.
Please talk to your kids so they understand too.
When meeting new people, be friendly, be kind!
Chances are, a new friend you will find!

We’re not so different after all!

By:Lorna d'Entremont

Adapted with permission from www.friendshipcircle.org/blog

How to prepare your child with special needs for Chanukah

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Chanukah is one of the more exciting holidays for children. With the lighting of the Menorah, an abundance of potato latkes, jelly donuts, games of Dreidel and plenty of Chanukah Gelt whats not to love?

For children with special needs, Chanukah may not be something to look forward to. Any change in routine can be stressful for those on the spectrum, because it changes what they have come to expect daily. This can cause much anxiety which can be terrifying rather than bringing fun and joy to the family celebration.

Here are some tips for preparing your child for Chanukah.

Social Stories

The most important thing to do for your child is to prepare them for what will be happening. One great way for doing this is the social story. This stories can be repetitive and simple. It is helpful to include pictures.

Create social stories about:

  • Lighting the Menorah

  • Attending services at a synagogue

  • Participating in a Chanukah Party

  • Chanukah Gelt and gifts

  • The tastes and smells of Chanukah (oil, sugar and some more oil!)

One Story Per Day

Prepare a visual schedule for your child for each day during the holiday so they can follow and understand what to expect. There are a number of great Chanukah Resources and social stories available at www.jgateways.org
Parties for children with special needs can be very difficult. Follow some these guidelines to make your child more comfortable at the event.

 

Prepare your child for a Chanukah Party

  1. If you know your child will not eat the food at a party or celebration, take along a familiar food for your child.

  2. Allow your child to bring a familiar comfort item to the party, or their own camera as their way of interacting.

  3. Do not force your child to do anything at the party that they are unsure of. Let them just observe. If your child becomes upset-take them to a quiet place to calm down.

  4. Allow your child to dress in what is most comfortable for them.

  5. Do not put unusually difficult demands on yourself. Come late or leave early if you need to. Be flexible about your schedule and keep the night a relaxed one.

  6. Tell your friends and relatives ahead of time that you will be bringing your child. This will give them time to prepare both emotionally and physically. This is a sure fire way to reduce tension at the party.

  7. Be realistic about what your expectations are. Do what you can do to make sure you and your child will enjoy.

By: Lissie Rothstein 

 

Adapted with Permission from www.FriendshipCircle.org/blog

Everything you need to know about Walk4Friendship 2018

Friendship Circle's 10th Annual Walk4Friendship will take place on Sunday, October 14th, at the Old Port of Montreal. join us and walk to promote friendship and inclusion for those with special needs. 

If you haven't registered, Register here

How to get to the walk site?

Sure it's an exciting new location but what's the best way to get there?
We're offering free shuttles from Walmart on Decarie to and from the walk - click here to reserve a spot. RSVP is a must.

Where can I Park?

 You can park at the onsite parking lot at the Clock Tower Pier 1 Quai de l'Horloge St, Montreal, QC H2L 5C1.  All those who fundraise $180 or more will receive complimentary parking tickets.


What is the exact location?  

Registration and Festivities will take place right beside the Playground at the Old Port, 1 Quai de l'Horloge St, Montreal, QC H2L 5C1

Click here for the walk and run routes


What will the walk celebration offer?

the exciting post walk festivities will include:

face painting • reptile zoo • glitter & airbrush tattoos • live music • caricature artists • circus acts • carnival games • balloon twisting • virtual reality • pizza • cotton candy • popcorn • drinks • mini train• & more! All for no charge thanks to generous sponsors!

All Walk4Friendship participants who fund raise $100 and above, will receive complimentary tickets to Montreal's "Giant Ferris Wheel" as well as tickets for Ziplining following the walk celebration! Generously donated by La Grande roue de Montréal and MTL Zipline!


Can I volunteer?

Yes, we still have a few more volunteer slots available! Please fill out the volunteer form and select which role would best suit you.

 

What I Learn From My Special Students

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I have been working with adults with disabilities for over twenty years. I started off as a Specialized Educator working for a Readaptation Centre. Then I was hired by the Lester B Pearson school board as a Special Education teacher in the adult sector five years ago. I am very blessed to do something that I love, working with these special students. Especially now, I have the opportunity to work at a local college where I teach work/social/life skills to a group of adults with a variety of disabilities. Rather than working in a conventional classroom, I use the entire college and surrounding community as my classroom! I work mostly one to one or in small groups. Although it can be a challenging environment at times, the teaching opportunities are endless! And most of the time, I believe that I am learning more from my special students that they are learning from me!

What I Learn From My Special Students

By working with this special population, I learn how to "think out of the box". Especially, if the student is not progressing and I need to adjust my teaching method. I learn patience while respecting their rhythm and speed of processing information. I learn to never underestimate my nonverbal students, they often have the most to say. By watching my students struggle at times, yet overcome their fears and anxieties, I learn resilience. I learn to focus on their strengths, helping them shine while trying to improve their weaknesses.

What I've learnt Most

There are two things that I learn most from my special students. I learn to see them as individuals like any other. I see passed their disabilities and focus on their abilities instead. Most of all, above all else I learn gratitude. One of the attributes that stands out the most with this special population is their sense of gratitude and appreciation for the little things. Over the past twenty years, this has always stood out for me. From them, I learn to be grateful every day for the most common things that most of us take for granted.

A New School Year

Back in June, I reflected on all the curriculum we covered and all the fun we had. I always really enjoy my last few weeks when things start to really wind down at the college and we enjoy walks on campus and visit the nearby community of Sainte-Anne-de-Bellevue. I always end the year off with a celebration lunch where I say my goodbyes until the end of August. Now that August is here, I start to get excited for a new school year where anything is possible! I especially look forward to seeing my special students again. I am welcomed back with the biggest smiles and loudest greetings! For this, and so many other things I am grateful to my students for teaching me so many important life lessons and helping me become the teacher that I am!

 

BY: ANGELA MACIOCIA

Angela is a Mother of 2 awesome boys, wife, athlete, runner, dog lover, clean eating cooking fanatic, and an adult special education teacher. Angela blogs to share her journey, life experiences, training, meals, & health/wellness tips in hopes of  helping, guiding, inspiring and most of all connecting with others. Angela has two boys ages 14 and 11. Her youngest is on the Autism Spectrum and her oldest has an ADHD diagnosis. She’s been in the field of special needs for over 20 years! She currently works for the Lester B Pearson school board. You can follow Angela at www.Angelamaciocia.com

One day discount for La Ronde's Autism Awareness day!

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We love seeing businesses and attractions accommodate people with special needs but it's even more wonderful to see establishments go out of their way to attract and welcome our special friends! 

On Sunday, August 5th La Ronde will be offering individuals with autism and their families special priced tickets of $27 per person ( Regular walk-up price for a one-day ticket is $65.99 plus tax) as well as free admission for one accompanying person. 

*Go to guest relations for an ATTRACTION ACCESS PASS to allow you to board the rides through the access ramp, so you won’t have to wait in the regular ride queue. 

 

Buy Tickets Here

What Dads of Kids with Special Needs Really Want for Father’s Day

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Father’s Day is upon us, and if you’re like many people, you’ve probably put your shopping off to the last minute. I am both a father and a son, so I am familiar with, and have made grudging peace with, the reality that if you forget Mother’s Day, you’re garbage offspring and deserve scorn, but forgetting Father’s Day probably merits an “eh, what are you gonna do?” We’re not too insulted. Most years, all I really want is an obscenely big meatful lunch at my favorite barbecue place, and I’ll even drive if need be. Once a year I participate in culinary atrocities against the critters of the barnyard, and that’s about all I require.

But it’s not too late to do a little special somethin’ somethin’ for the dads in your life, and one group that gets overlooked perhaps more than most are the fathers of kids with disabilities. Special needs dads deserve some particular rewards this Father’s Day. Here are a few suggestions, if you’re still shopping. (Neckties are the noose of capitalism, you know. Unless they have funny things printed on them.)

1. Special Fix-It Tool

There are some clichés about fathers in general that are outdated and stupid. (Homer Simpson does not represent the vast majority of us, except perhaps where beer and/or donuts are concerned.) But honestly, there are a few that have their roots in reality. One of those might just be our impulse, rooted in millennia of tradition and cultural programming, to fix things that are broken, or inefficient, or perhaps just working differently than we’re accustomed to.

For the special needs father, this impulse can be particularly frustrating. It’s not always in vain; my own impulse to provide a solution for my nonverbal daughter’s obstacles probably led me to become an even stronger advocate for assistive technology than I might have otherwise been. And I’m struck by the large number of accomplished and innovative men in the field of assistive technology, even as the larger world of disability support trends decidedly female. It’s a stereotype, the fix-it father, but it holds some truth, I think.

For that special needs dad, I’d like to recommend a very special fix-it tool. This tool doesn’t fix our children. They don’t necessarily require repair, nor is it ever that simple anyway. This tool fixes the world. It fixes a society that doesn’t easily accept our kids. It repairs schools that don’t understand or embrace inclusivity. This tool will adjust the expectations of employers and open doors to opportunity and understanding that have been jammed for years. And most of all, this tool will unlock personal depths of acceptance and understanding and patience in fathers like myself.

I’m working on that tool. It seems like it has taken roughly seventeen years to assemble, and it’s not finished yet. But it’s a work in progress. I’ll let you know how it goes. (Accepting pre-orders now.)

2. A Hat Rack

One of the lessons I have learned as I’ve grown older is that advocacy has a lot more gray areas than I ever imagined. The most recent lesson came when my teenage daughter was subjected to some pretty awful sexual harassment by a classmate of hers. The situation became more complicated when it turned out that the young man in question had an intellectual disability as well.

The statistics for young disabled women and the sexual harassment and sexual assault they experience are horrifying. As we strive to build an inclusive environment, special needs fathers are faced with some uncomfortable truths, and one of the most difficult is that when young people with disabilities are learning to navigate the complex world around them, some of the failures can be awkward and even dangerous. As special needs fathers, we are tasked with protecting our kids, and sometimes protecting other vulnerable people from our kids. And sometimes the lines, and our responsibilities, can be hard to discern.

So for my fellow special needs dads, might I suggest a hat rack for Father’s Day. Because try as you might, there will be days when you simple cannot wear your Advocate Hat and your Dad Hat at the same time.

3. A Club Membership

This parenting stuff is hard. It really is. It’s hard for the obvious reasons, but for the special needs parent, there are some special circumstances. It’s isolating. It can be exhausting, and there is absolutely no guidebook. There are a lot of resources online (how did parents do this before the Internet?), but fathers will quickly find that the majority of these communities are dominated by mothers, and it can feel like we’re not part of the discussion.

The whole “Why aren’t special needs dads statistically more involved in the care of their kids?” discussion is maybe one for another time, but there’s definitely a chicken and egg quality to it. Do disability parenting resources focus primarily on mothers because fathers are hesitant to participate, or are dads stepping back because the resources can often feel exclusionary? Like the owl and the Tootsie Roll Pop, the world may never know.

Regardless of the why, special needs fathers can be particularly isolated. That’s why I suggest a club membership. Find your people, in the real world or online. (Let’s be real, though; probably online.) Find your dad tribe, and embrace each other. Hugging’s okay. Sadly, few people are watching us anyway.

4. An Air Horn

For those moments at IEP meetings when dads feel invisible and unheard. (Honestly, isn’t that the best mental image ever?)

 

By: Robert Rummel-Hudson

Robert Rummel-Hudson is the author of Schuyler's Monster: A Father's Journey with His Wordless Daughter (St. Martin's Press 2008). He is a regular contributor to Support for Special Needs and lectures on assistive technology and disability rights. He lives in Plano, Texas, where he watches many monster movies with Schuyler.

 

Adapted with permission from www.FriendshipCircle.org/Blog